When you’re a caregiver for a loved one with Dementia, stress is a big part of the job. They want to drive, they don’t want to bathe, won’t change clothes or take meds. These are some of the stress triggers caregivers are faced with.
Stress is a killer.
We don’t always think of stress as being deadly, but studies have shown that stress not only keeps us up at night, but we’re more likely to get sick when we’re stressed out. Over time, stress can affect your heart, your blood pressure, and can eventually kill you.
Now I don’t want to be a negative Nancy… so before you start fearing for your life, know that you CAN make a change. By learning to let go of the small stuff in your life, you’ll be better able to handle the bigger things. And while you may still experience stress from time to time, you’ll be better equipped to cope with it and save your sanity, and your health – from the long-term effects of out of control stress.
How do you do that?
1. Accept that there’s going to be stress. Let’s face it, there’s always going to be something that will put the pressure on you – whether it’s another trip to the ER because mom knows better than to have fluids after 7pm or just another unpleasant encounter with your loved one. By acknowledging that not everything is going to go right makes you better able to handle it when things do go wrong.
2. Take a moment and breathe – or better yet, take two and try practicing mindfulness. Once you’ve acknowledged the stress for what it is, take a deep breath, and then another. Don’t let your emotions overwhelm you. By being mindful, or meditating you gain back control. Breathe in and out deeply, taking the time to focus on that single act until you’re calm again.
3. Allow yourself to examine what’s stressing you. But only take a moment. By putting a time limit on stressful thinking, you keep from wallowing in fear or anger. Why think about it at all you may ask. Because chances are there’s going to be some problem solving necessary to deal with whatever is causing the stress. Give yourself enough time to examine the problem, and then set it aside so that you can work on the solution.
4. Realize that it’s not that bad. If You’re having a particularly tough day and mom just refuses to change clothes is it really that bad. Probably not. As a caregiver, I’ve learned to pick my battles. If I make a big deal out of everything, ( you know drama queens) then when a real issue comes up it won’t have the same impact.
Stress doesn’t have to destroy you, especially when it’s made up of a whole lot of small stuff that’s more irritating than life-changing. By managing the small stuff, you protect not just your mind but your body as well. So don’t sweat the small stuff. And realize really that in the end – it’s all small stuff.
So… how are you going to stress a little less in the coming weeks?
Let me know.
Comment below.