Sometime, when mom is having a bad day it makes me get into a funk also. The thought I have is I need a drink… or something stronger to calm my nerves. But I’m really not one for medication whether prescribed or the other kind so I had to come up with something else. So I just started thinking… and the thinking is what i learned is like meditating. Getting started with meditation is a lot easier than you may think. In the beginning I didn’t even know meditation was what I was doing. You see with my mom’s dementia, she needed to start wearing adult diapers. With that comes the time when she needs to be changed. And she is not always ready and willing so this became a constant source of frustration for me. Pulling and tugging… fighting hitting name calling ENOUGH! Sometimes I can’t get it done at the time it needs to be done. And that’s ok. But sometimes I can’t and then I’m wound up like a 10-day clock. I had to get away. But where can I go? I’ll never forget the first time. My mom was being resistant and I was getting frustrated. I went in the backyard and sat with my eyes closed facing the sun it was a warm day and the trees were blowing in the wind. The sway of the trees sounded like waves on the beach… I felt it with my whole body… so relaxing.
I was on the beach.
There isn’t any special equipment you need to buy or classes to take. While buying a book, or a guided meditation audio recording or even an app for your smartphone are certainly options, you don’t even have to do that to get started. I’ll share a few things you need to know to get started meditating right here in this post.
Start by getting comfortable in a spot that’s as free of distractions as possible. You want to sit down either on a chair with your feet firmly planted on the ground, or sitting cross-legged on the floor. If you sit on the floor, you’ll be more comfortable if you sit on a cushion and keep your back straight. Slumping may make you sleepy while you meditate, and bad posture can cause you discomfort.
Before we start with the actual meditation, let’s get back to distractions. In the beginning, you want to cut out as many of them out as possible. Choose a quiet spot where no one will interrupt you. Turn off the ringer on your phone, close the blinds if you think it will help to create a calm and soothing space. You won’t always have to go through all this trouble to meditate because with practice, you’ll be able to do this meditation exercise I’m about to share with you anytime, anywhere. But like any new skill, meditating can be a little hard in the beginning. It sounds simple enough, but it’s easy to get distracted. That’s why it’s important to set yourself up for success by cutting out any distractions.
Here’s how to meditate.
Sit down, close your eyes, and focus on your breathing. Notice how the air flows in and out of your nose and mouth. Try to think of nothing else. This is the hard part and something that takes practice. Start meditating for a few minutes here and there and increase the time as you move along. Don’t judge yourself when your thoughts stray. Keep bringing yourself back to the sensation of you breathing anytime you notice that you’re thinking of something else.
That’s pretty much all there’s to it. Getting started with meditation is simple, but like any new skill, it takes practice. Being a caregiver for someone with dementia is difficult enough. It’s important to learn how to manage your emotions. Meditation is just one way. Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Stick with it and keep practicing this new meditation skills. You’ll be glad you did.
“Sometimes the most productive thing we can do is focus on ourselves”-Britt Julious